Some Things Never Change

As a new parent, I often found myself quietly walking into the baby’s bedroom just to watch their chest rise and fall. I hadn’t heard a peep from the baby in the hours since I put them to sleep. I merely wanted to make sure the baby was still breathing. The night after Este's concussion both Aaron and I went in to check on him. It is even more interesting to check on your baby boy who is almost 18 years old. I was watching my baby who happens to be the size of a man. It doesn't matter. He will always be my baby boy. Some things never change.

Aaron and I were both anxious the night we returned from the ER. The doctors told us since the CT scans and x-rays were clear we did not need to wake him up throughout the night. That didn’t help us sleep any better though. We were still concerned about our baby.

Esteban’s early morning seminary teacher is an orthopedic surgeon and sports medicine doctor. We visited him in his office the next morning.  That is when I discovered that Este has never watched The Price is Right. I grew up on that show.

Anyway, before the appointment, Aaron and I were more worried about his back and less worried about his concussion. We were wrong. The back injury was only a muscle strain. It would heal quickly. The concussion, however, was very serious. He had suffered a stage 3 concussion. It is one of the worst. Este’s concussion was in the top 5% of bad concussions. There could be ramifications that would affect the rest of his life. If he returned to the football field before he was completely healed and had another hit of equal impact, he could die instantly. It is called second hit syndrome.

Este struggled to remember and recall information. Memorizing while recovering from this injury would be damaging to his brain. Esteban has worked to maintain straight A’s throughout his school life.  Academics come easy to him. He was in the middle of applying for academic scholarships all over the country. It all had to come to a halt until he recovered. His brain was functioning at less than 50% of normal. He was struggling to remember simple facts.  We emailed his school counselor, who in turn emailed all his teachers. He would be allowed to come and go to school as he felt up to it. He was not to take any quizzes or tests until he was better. He would be given special treatment as long as needed.

The doctor asked Este what his favorite TV show was. Este explained that he didn’t have time to watch TV. The doctor explained him that his life just changed. He was ordered to watch TV or play mindless video games. He needed to rest and he needed to let his brain rest.

That sounds easy enough. The problem is we had scheduled painters to repaint our house.  As Este tried to rest and relax and as people came over to visit him, they were greeted by a great big mess.

Coaches, friends, neighbors, and family tromped over the drop clothes and past the open cans of paint  to visit Este. The outpouring of love and concern was overwhelming. It was amazing to see all the people who were worried about him.  Jace drew a wonderful get well soon card for Este. Jace's smile was big enough for the both of them.

Ethan later asked if it was hard for me to hear about how damaging and serious the concussion could be. He asked if it was hard to hear that my son could die. I told Ethan that the hardest thing for me was when I first saw him. Ethan had been on the field that day in practice. He did not see the hit but he saw Este laying there unconscious. He saw the seizure. Ethan thought he was going to watch his brother die that day. It really shook him up. He held it together since he is a big strong teenage boy and he was with his football friends and teammates but I could see the concern and fear in his eyes and that was the hardest part of this whole ordeal.

I love watching my boys grow up. I enjoy being with them and deep down inside I even enjoy it when they give me a hard time and tease me. The thing is no matter how big they get, they are all three taller than me now, they will always be my little boys. I will always be concerned about their welfare. I don’t want to see them sick or injured. I will always recognize fear and sadness in their face. I will always be their mother. Like I said, some things never change.